After a tense disagreement with her fiancé, a lady struggling with her five-year relationship resorted to the internet community for support.
She began to doubt the dynamics of their partnership when they got into a heated argument about money.
She opened up about her experience in a real post on the “Am I The A*****e” thread on Reddit.
After five years together, the 32-year-old woman, also known as Original Poster (OP), said that she got engaged to her 35-year-old partner. Following the proposal, May 2025 was chosen as the couple’s wedding date.
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OP’s grandma, however, passed away not long after the engagement.
According to OP, her grandfather and grandmother were “very successful” and held well-paying positions for the most of their lives. Naturally, OP received a “hugely generous” amount of money as a legacy. But this was the start of the problems.
My fiancé was ecstatic when I told him the news, far more so than I had anticipated. I accepted it and ignored it until later in the day, when I overheard him telling his friends, “I can use that money to pay off my credit card, buddy!” OP stated in her post, “At last, we can take the boys vacation we’ve been arranging, ay?’ and laughed.
“I walked into the room and asked, ‘What money?’” she said. and he gave me a strange look right away before saying, “From your nan, babe.”
The wife claimed to have “immediately exploded on him,” telling him he would not be spending the money for a lads’ vacation and that she would not authorize him to pay for anything.
“It’s written to me from MY nanna, it’s not for you,” OP claimed she told her fiancé. “It’s not your money to have,”
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The OP claimed that she became furious and fled the room when this finally broke out into a shouting confrontation. After finishing his game, the fiancé confronted her outside the kitchen, telling her, “We are getting married, you will become my financial burden.” I own all of the money you earn. You were really self-centered to make me look foolish in front of my friends and to give them the impression that I was on vacation.
The woman continued to write in her post that she went to stay at her friend’s house after silently leaving the house. In closing, she inquired as to whether she was acting like an a*****e.
The woman received a flood of sympathy and support from other internet users after publishing her message.
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“All right, so he’s shown you that he views you as a burden and that he intends to give his ‘boys’ money that isn’t really his.” He’s yelling at you because you’re not going along with his plans. One commenter commented, “You’re nuts if you actually marry him.”
“You really want to marry this guy?,” said a second. There are two issues: 1. He believed he had a right to the money. 2. He believed he could use money for a non-you discretionary purchase. PT2 is the more significant issue.
One commenter said, “Stop the wedding.” Never marry this man. Wow, to start with, he has credit card debt that he has never paid off? Overspending is a HABIT for him. What’s yours is his, and what’s his is his, secondly? No, honey, I’m sorry. Thirdly, the fury? claim to entitlement and DARVO—implying that you would be “the burden” in their partnership? This dude demonstrates every hallmark of a narcissist.
They went on: “The wisdom of this guy’s true nature lies beneath the money, which was your grandparents’ final gift to you. Lackluster, violent, conceited, and parasitic. Run.
